


Cause of Death: You in That Dress

by sawberry



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: F/M, Fake AH Crew, and a boss ass bitch, and adorable, jack is a lady, michael and geoff are overprotective
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-05
Updated: 2015-08-05
Packaged: 2018-04-13 03:41:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4506363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sawberry/pseuds/sawberry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Geoff was convinced that if a bullet didn't take him, this woman would be the death of him.</p><p>Inspired by the prompt: "“Please put me down, it’s just a sprained ankle.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cause of Death: You in That Dress

**Author's Note:**

> Jack's Outfit: http://www.polyvore.com/night_out/set?id=171800990  
> Lindsay's Outfit: http://www.polyvore.com/paint_it_red/set?id=171803851

“There’s no way you’re wearing that,” Geoff said as Jack stepped out of the bathroom. He didn’t even turn to look at her when he said it, he just caught her eye in the mirror he was using to adjust his bow tie.

“And why not?” Jack asked, going over to her own mirror and putting on some earrings, “I happen to think I look lovely.

It wasn’t that Jack didn’t look perfect, it’s that she did look perfect. The dress clung to her curves perfectly, the small cut out just near the navel and the slit to the left that started midway gave you peek of what was underneath and made you fantasize about more. That was Geoff’s issue, they were going to the Mayor’s ball in order to schmooze with the cops and see how much dirt they actually had on the crew. He didn’t need, and certainly didn’t want, any of the pigs eyeing up his girl while they did so. But, he couldn’t tell Jack that. If she found out he was jealous she’d never let him live it down, and neither would the boys who she’d no doubt tell. He needed an excuse, now.

“It’s those shoes,” He lied expertly, making a noncommittal gesture towards the woman's feet, “What if we have to make a quick escape? You can’t outrun the cops in Louboutin's.” He knew Jack planned her outfits to the point where she’d rather choose a new outfit all together then change an aspect of it.

“Oh sweetheart,” She said, sashaying towards him in a way that made him feel a thousand degrees warmer, “You _s_ _everely_  underestimate me.”

“I’m just trying to help you out babe,” He said, leaning his head up as she leaned down to fix his bowtie, “wouldn’t want you spraining an ankle and being M.I.A.”

“I’ll be fine,” She replied coolly, grabbing his hand to pull him up to stand. She was the same height, if not a smidge taller than him in the shoes.

“You sure?” He asked, “We have time for you to change.”

“You worry too much Geoff,” She laughed before booping him on the nose, “You know what, I am so sure of my abilities I’ll make you a deal.”

“And what you that deal be?” Geoff asked, wrapping his arms around her waist to pull her closer unable to not give in to Jack’s charm. God this girl had him wrapped around her finger.

“If I so much as pull a muscle in these heels tonight you get to pick the next thing we do on the kink list, but if I win I get to pick.” She stated, putting her arms on Geoff’s shoulders and linking her fingers behind his neck. Geoff pretended to mull over the idea, in actuality he was planning out how the night was gonna go. There was clearly no way Jack was changing, he supposed he could always stay near here so nobody got any bright ideas and tell the guys to keep an eye on her as well. Satisfied with his idea he responded to the bet.

“Fine,” He faux sighed, “Do you know where we can buy some whips? I’ve got a few ideas for when I win.”

“Hm, you seem awful sure of yourself,” Jack said, pulling him closer her and arching her back in order to press herself closer.

“I like to think my cockiness is one of my best traits,” Geoff replied, moving his hands from her waist to the small of her back before pulling them flush against each other.

“Eh, it’s alright,” Jack said, shrugging her shoulders before meeting Geoff for a kiss. Geoff pulled away before things could get too heated. He linked their fingers and they walked down the stairs together to meet up with the rest of the crew.

To make sure no stone was left unturned the whole crew was going in under guises. Ray and Gavin were posing as servers, Michael was posing as a bartender, Ryan was going be playing guard near the door, Lindsay was pretending to be a reporter, Jack and himself were going in as representatives of some rinky dink district they added to the guest list when they hacked it.

“Holy shit, Jack you look smokin’,” exclaimed Lindsay from where she was talking to Michael when they walked in.

“Thanks,” Jack said, walking over to the other red head, “I’d say we all are probably the hottest crew this side of liberty city right about now.”

“I don’t know about you,” Ray chimed in, “but I think I’m always hot.”

While they made small talk Geoff gestured to Michael to come over.

“Yo,” Michael said when he made his way over, “What’s up bossman?”

“I need you to do me favor.” Geoff stated, leaning towards Michael as to not have his voice heard.

“What? Is something wrong?” Michael’s mood immediately went serious at tone of Geoff’s voice.

“Nothing too major,” Geoff explained, “I just want you to keep an eye on Jack tonight. I know she can take care of herself but I don’t want any guys trying to make a pass at her.”

“Gotcha,” Michael nodded, “But can I ask you something in return?”

“Sure, what’s up?” Geoff asked.

“Keep an eye on Linds would’ya?” He asked with a blush as he turned to look at the girl who was now laughing at something Jack or Ray had said. Geoff sympathized with the boy. Lindsay, much like Jack, had taken advantage of the rare opportunity to dress up and had gone all out. Strapless red dress, black heels and clutch, large diamond earrings, she looked pretty good and even if Michael wasn’t the protective type he’d still ask the boy if he wanted Geoff to keep an eye on her.

“Sure thing bud,” Geoff answered, clapping him on the shoulder. He smiled and walked over to the girl in question. Soon Jack was in his place and she was looking at them with a fond smile. “Remind you of someone?”

“I would say us,” She responded, “But I’m pretty sure they outrank us in every way, shape, and form.” Geoff just laughed, they stayed there and chatted for a while until Gavin and Ryan came in from where they were outside.

“Kdin and Kerry just pulled up with the Limos,” Gavin said before heading back out. They all went outside and went over the plan again; Lindsay was riding with Kdin, Jack and Geoff were riding with Kerry, the rest of the crew were taking individual cars. The car ride there was relatively quiet as they both tried to get in the headspace of their characters. They were Shannon and Dexter Rattillo; representatives of district 236. As soon as the limo stopped Geoff jumped into action, getting up to open the door for Jack.

“Are you ready Mrs. Rattillo?” He asked, adding a drawl to his voice in order to sound more sophisticated.

“Always darling,” She purred back. They got out the car and were greeted by the flashing of cameras and a flurry of questions, they both just politely waved and made their way into the ballroom. Geoff tapped the comm in his ear to turn it on.

“Alright guys remember,” He said, using his “boss voice”, “We are normal people, we’re curious about how the force is responding to the current threat of the Fake AH Crew, got it?” After he got confirmation he set out to do his work. He and Jack schmoozed up to every pig in the room; claiming they wanted to know about the crew and everyone in it to make sure they weren’t a threat to their district, Lindsay pestered anybody who looked like they could inform them of something, the lads lured people in with hors devours and booze before going in for the kill, and Ryan stood quietly by the door in order to listen in on any and all conversations.

_“Psh, Ramsey? Guy’s nothing to worry about, he’s all bark and no bite.”_

_“Pattillo? Please, that bitch looks like nothing more than some arm candy for Ramsey.”_

_“Team lads I think was one of the names of one of their little groups? All I know is they seem like a few rich kids who’re bored and stupid.”_

_“Vagabond? I’m almost positive all his shit is for show, he probably hasn’t even done half the shit people say.”_

_"That Tuggey bitch? She's probably just a fucktoy for the crew."_

After a few hours and having to remind the crew that this was a “no murder mission”, they concluded that nobody really knew how real of a threat the crew was and they should be good. All in all the night was pretty successful, only a few people had eyed Jack up but once he settled next to her and was introduced as her husband they quickly averted their eyes. He also kept his promise to Michael and stopped more than few men from getting too flirty with Lindsay.

“Alrighty boys I think we’ve gotten all we’re gonna get, you all can head out if you want.” Geoff said into the comm. While nobody made a comment he saw them all move to go; Ryan, Ray and Gav all subtly moving more towards the exits, Lindsay shaking a person’s hand as she ended the conversation and headed towards the bar where Michael was yelling final call.

Jack reached down to link her fingers with Geoff and pull him over to the dance floor. The party attendees had trickled out over the last hour so the floor was mostly empty, she linked her hands behind his neck while he moved his to her hips and they swayed to the soft waltz that was playing over the speakers. They danced like that for a while, occasionally dropping little kisses onto one and other.

“You know,” she whispered into the miniscule amount of air between them, “I think I won our little bet.”

“The night isn’t over you know,” He said leaning his head down a bit to give her a chaste kiss on the lips before dropping her into a dip. The giggles that fell from her lips sent his heart to the moon.

“You know you’re gonna have to do better than that,” She countered, a devious smirk. He was about to make some witty remark but the music had shut off and the musicians seemed to be calling it a night. Jack giggled again at the defeated sigh that left Geoff, she kissed him on the nose and led him out the door. He commed Kerry and told that they were ready, he leaned against the railing of the steps leading into the building but when he went to place his hand he was only met with air and was quickly went into a freefall over the railing and down the few feet to the ground. He looked up to see Jack leaning over the rail trying to hold back a laugh. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah I’m fine,” He answered. He tried to get up but a sharp pain in his ankle made him buckle and lean against the wall.

“Oh dear,” Jack gasped as she saw him go against the wall, “Hang on I’m coming.” Soon she was down by Geoff and looping an arm over his shoulders. They tried to walk but the height difference with Jack in her heels and Geoff slouching made it almost impossible. They simply stood there until Kerry pulled up. Then an idea popped into Jack’s head; she bent down to grab under Geoff’s knees. Geoff quickly caught on to what she was doing and tried to protest.

“Jacqueline Shannon Pattillo do not-” His plea was cut off as she scooped Geoff up bridal style and carried him to the limo. “Please put me down, it’s just a sprained ankle.” Jack didn’t answer and simply kept carrying him until Kerry got out of the limo and opened the door for her. Not even Geoff’s death glare stopped his laughter. Eventually they both made it in and Jack flopped down onto the seat in a pile of giggles.

“You know,” She said, still laughing, “We never discussed how the bet would end if _you_  hurt your ankle.” Geoff couldn’t stay mad at her, he giggled along with her and they both dissolved into a fit of laughter in the back of the limo.

“I swear,” Geoff said once they’d stopped laughing, “If a bullet doesn’t get me first, you’re gonna be the death of me doll.”

“Oh really?” She replied with a smirk.

“Yep,” Geoff answered, “It gonna say in my obituary; ‘Geoff Ramsey. Leader of biggest and most awesome gang ever. Cause of death: you in that dress.”

She giggled and smiled fondly at him. How they ended up in the same seat they never found out, they just sort of gravitated towards each other. But they had the other safe in their arms, and that was all that mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> Woo! First Jackoff fic! Not gonna lie I was (and still am) a bit unsure of how much I like this but I figured I'd post it anyway!
> 
> Next story is gonna be a fluffy FAHC Micheoff one-shot that may or may not have smut, haven't decided. I've also got three other stories lined up including FAHC Raywood smut, FAHC Freewood fluff/angst, and a possible fluffy Risingwood High School au. Remember if you have prompts to send them to my Tumblr (itisithekawaiifrenchfry) and I'll see what I can do.
> 
> As always thanks for reading! Be sure to leave kudos and subscribe for more!


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